Sometimes parallel romantic sympathies arise simultaneously with love, which can destroy relationships. As psychologists have noted, even creating a serious connection, people do not stop noticing other people around. However, to admit that someone other than a permanent partner is of interest is not yet a threat. Relationship risk occurs when the desire to change becomes obsessive.
According to experts, first you need to understand the nature of such a need. She is believed to have several reasons.
The need to boost self-esteem
Typically, this need arises in people who have been victims of gaslighting. Having lost self-confidence, such men will seek an additional portion of love even in strong relationships. In this case, they are guided by the formula: the more women love me, the better I am.
relationship problems
If there are difficulties in a relationship, it is important to learn how to talk to each other in order to solve them. However, some men prefer to “run away” from problems and seek solace with another person.
Desire to avoid attachment
In this case, it is easier for a man to have many superficial connections than one deep one. “The basis is the fear of vulnerability to a partner and the fear of being rejected,” explained psychologist Elena Klen.
Unmet Needs
In the case of such a betrayal, the roots grow from the fact that people often confuse sensations and thoughts, and then they are afraid of their own impulses, told psychologist Anastasia Korneeva. According to her, “to want someone is not to change yet.” What matters is how a man then deals with the reactions of his body.
Compensation for the fear of betrayal
In this case, a so-called preemptive strike occurs: you are not yet with me, but I am already with you. Psychologists note that this is how the protective mechanism of the psyche works, so the most jealous people are usually the first to change.
chronic infidelity
Sometimes fidelity is not at all included in the value system of a man and physical intimacy for him is not treason. In his understanding, sex and feelings are completely different things. The only way out of this situation is to find a partner with a similar value system or live in an “open relationship”, waiting for whoever gets bored first.
